Why So Emotional?

This week, Annie's Mail Bag (advice column replacement for that of the late Ann Landers) has featured letters from readers whose marriages have been affected by adultery. The two editors wanted to hear from those who had forgiven their mates and gone on with their marriages as well as those who divorced  their  mates. They  were overwhelmed by the response: 40,000+  letters.

As I read the responses, I was struck by the  deep feelings (shock, anger, love) expressed. Among those that divorced (the majority) I found some of the statements at first humorous, then sad:: "Once a liar, always a liar!"; "Once a snake, always a snake!"; “Once a cheater, always a cheater,” etc. The feelings of bitterness and betrayal cut deep and have left scars.

In view of those responses, I can't help but think of our nation and the flippant attitude that so many have toward marriage. Some people marry with very shallow thoughts and unrealistic expressions. They treat it as if it is something that is a "light" part of their life—that if one marriage doesn't work out, another spouse can be found later. They fail to realize, however, the emotional impact divorce can have on their mates and themselves. In the midst of marriage troubles employers  see productivity decline, friends see changes in attitude, and the  health  of  the  spouses may be affected. But why are people  so emotional?—Isn't this just a passing fancy, something a person can easily overcome? 

Those of us who are Christians know the answer to those questions.  We know God made us male and female (Genesis 1:26, 27). We know that most people need the emotional and physical bonding that takes place in marriage (Genesis 2:18, 24). Most of us acknowledge the blessing that marriage has been to our life. We KNOW why the emotions described in the Annie's Mail Bag response were so strong—and why there was so much mail in response.

Marriage is meant to bring people together; it is meant to be a relationship of  love and acceptance; it is meant to be a union of hearts; it is meant to be the outlet for sexual release; and it was meant to be a place of trust, where one can invest freely in another person and expect the same in return. When that trust is broken, disappointment and heartache can only be expected.

Our nation has sown the wind of shallow, lustful relationships—and we are reaping the whirlwind (Hosea 8:7). "But, from the beginning, it was not so . . ." (Matthew 19:8).  —Lance Cordle